From the makers of Splenda and the woman who brought you such people as my brother and me…
I give you, a salvaged Mother’s Day surprise:
Splenda’s use-exactly-as-sugar directions screwed me today. I have a killer, easy recipe for chocolatey, oaty, peanut buttery goodness that was going to give me about 30 cookies. When made with Splenda? The recipe results in three of the above-pictured hearts.
Garbage. But cute garbage.
I have another tray of different cookies in the oven which are also going to be a baking fail since the newf has been skimming chocolate chips off the top for weeks now and I have no interest in putting on pants for a grocery run. They will be fine although substantially less chocolatey.
At least she will be happy that I didn’t continue to tarnish her reputation by posting quotes such as: “3.8 GPA? The only 3.8 I had in university was blood-alcohol level!”
She likes to pretend that one never happened. BUT IT SO DID.
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It’s taken me forever to get through my reader this week but “Theo dressed up as a drunk relative- which he often is” has had me giggling for the last 3-4 minutes. A long time as giggles go.
Peter: It’s a pretty sweet cupboard. If I ever build a house, it’ll have a lifesized one.
Erin: Agreed.
WonderSpot: Believe me, you don’t want to be like me.
Lauren: Hahaha a surprise puppy-in-cupboard would be hysterical.
Oh man. I’d be so happy if I turned a lazy susan and found a puppy. that picture is adorable!
And the timeline? Hilarious.
Wow. That last picture is about killing me.
And here I thought I was going overboard by getting Tonks her own twitter account. Now I have so much more to strive for.
I am fascinated by this. Mind you, not so fascinated that I would pay money for it, but fascinated nonetheless.
Some of those websites/services really seem like clever satire these days.
But that cupboard looks awesome!
They are so adorable!
A.) This is exactly what I missed!
B.) I love you guys all the more for this.
When you said the boys had a condo I imagined one of those carpeted cat condos. This is far more priceless.
“like a hooker at sunrise”…
i effing love you.
Their little space looks cozy! I can see the headlines now… “Dog Who Dwells in Cupboard Invades Russia–Accomplice loots local beer supply.”
haha i love that the dogs are in the cupboard, so cute. and so funny.
Normally I would be all, “Dude! It’s so gross to put your dogs in a kitchen cupboard!”
But the picture proves me wrong.
Aw, thats so adorable! Lol
That picture is priceless!
Aww, that is so adorable. This makes me wish my puppies were small and could do things like that!
Well, now I am further convinced that my pets are on the Internet conversing with other pets while I’m asleep because Weedy has been trying to take up residence in the kitchen cupboard for a while now.
The pics of the pups in the cupboard is a gem!
Lucky dogs! That looks so cozy.
You must REALLY love those dogs b/c that is precious storage space for spices and snacks and such. I hope they don’t take you for granted.
That doggie condo is the best thing ever. And I adore dachshunds.
Too. Freakin. Cute. Now I wish I had a lazy susan. The Sharpei/Dane couldn’t use it but I’m betting my Chi/IG would.
Their days would be “Sleep in kennel with big fluffy bed that matches mom’s and people size blanket. Roll over. Sigh dramatically and give brother a dirty look. Continue sleeping” for the chig and “Sleep ON mom’s bed. Pee on something inappropriate – in pajama drawer left open 1/2″ or on foot of bed are both good. Chew foot/tail/penis. Continue sleeping” for the big one. They lead pretty easy lives. I, on the other hand, get to clean pee every day because someone beat and traumatized my boy and he can’t be kenneled. He’s lucky he’s cute.
I’m not going to lie – Stella and Wolfgang each have their own facebook page. What? I have a boring job.
can you do it for cats, too? because i would TOTALLY pay to know what my cats are getting into every day. they’re about 2 weeks from developing opposable thumbs, the little shits.
Ok you win. Your dogs are officially way more spoiled than mine. The cupboard? Incredible.
Also going to check out the new site since it seems better than Dogster where my dogs currently have their webpages.
Cutest. Thing. Ever. They look so warm…
And my mom can NEVER find out about that site, because it would result in her losing her job as she glues herself to the computer to see how the dog survives without her all day.
Ari and I were just talking about this last night. I can’t believe it.
Edie wants this. It would record about 15 hours of the day as “Winston latched on to Edie’s neck while Edie lays there like seriously?”
I would get drunk with your dog and then make bad decisions.
Hope you’re ok with that.
I think Tinkerbell the cat needs to be on it…waiting patiently for it to hit Canada.
There is probably a photo of me in the exact same position as Theo the drunk relative. My aunt’s jack russell has to get past me before she can curl up near the heating grate when it’s chilly.
I love the picture of the two of them in the cupboard. Hilarious.
Even the pets are on twitter now. I will for sure be following.
My mom knitted a special blankie for my cats. Yeah. Handmade.
Alice’s day:
wake up and go out to pee.
eat breakfast.
wait for people to leave.
sniff the cat’s ass.
nose through the trash.
help mom clean cat box.
take a nap.
eat trash snack.
take a nap.
wait for people to come home.
pee.
have dinner.
go to sleep.
I’m jealous of everything except the cat’s ass, the cat box and the trash can.
Theo sounds like my kind of pup.
I think the lazy susan for the dogs is fan-f*cking-tastic! I wish I had one so my kitties could have their own condo in the kitchen. Wait, they get in the cabinets already even though they’re not supposed to. Damn cats, they do whatever they want!
With puppies like that, I seriously can’t even blame you for spoiling them. SO cute!
I love the puppy condo. Such a clever idea, and they look so happy to be in there!
Okay the dogs in the cabinet? That image just totally made my day.
wow that sounds pretty awesome. I want one for my cat!
Oh too funny! For Ash & Mal every other item would be “steal rocks from the plant upstairs, hide from humans”
I hope they break into Canada soon, I still have a week left at my job and nothing to do!
Awwww cuties!!
I wonder if they make those tags for humans…
I’m still so in love with that vent picture…sigh. April can’t come soon enough!
Ben, that condo is by far the cutest thing I’ve seen all day. But its 9:18am, so you know take that with a grain of whatever.
I would like to rent that condo from the boys for a week or two. Should I call Theo to arrange?
Here’s the cat version, with Kitty as model:
Give dirty looks when woken up when the human gets ready for work. Sleep. Clean butt. Sleep. Hear the human come home from work and roll around the carpet, looking cute for belly rubs. Sleep. Go poop. Run around the house like a crazed animal on speed because of pooping. Sleep on the human’s chest because it’s warm and funny.
Her social media timeline would be the same every day.
I’m afraid as far as the cupboard goes, I’m going to have to go with ‘adorable.’
As for the DoggyTwitter, I’m now convinced that my dogs lead terribly boring lives.
Olivia has been on Dogster since day one. But I’m too overwhelmed by my own social media to keep up with hers.
That picture of them in the cupboard is 8 kinds of adorable.
One of my friends recently made her a cat a Twitter account. Worse still, I’m actually following the cat.
It’s a slippery, slippery slope, my friend.