“I’ve got it. I finally figured out what my next goal in life is.”
“Oh? Do tell. Does it include no longer being such a volatile and ridiculous human being?
“Shaddup. And no. No it doesn’t.”
“I figured that would be too good to be true. So….what is it?”
“SELF-ACTUALIZATION.”
“Self-actualization? Are you kidding me?”
“What…too much?”
“Okay. The fact that your ‘goal’ is to achieve the theoretical highest level of being is just….uh…just…so you. And I don’t mean that in a good way.”
“Well. I was going to say finally getting promoted to demi god status but I figured I’d add in another step. You know….not to rush things.”
“So you’re suggesting that at age 24, you’ve achieved everything you can in the way of physical belongings, safety and health, love and intimacy, self-respect and reputation. And you have nothing else – perhaps smaller – that you’d like to do before you move on?”
“Are you suggesting that I haven’t? ‘Cause I’ll cut you.”
“See…someone ready for self-actualization wouldn’t threaten someone offering an objective opinion with violence.”
“I’ve moved on. I’m back on the Demigod train AND I WILL NOT BE AS SYMPATHETIC AS THE CURRENT MANAGEMENT.”
“Let’s talk when you’ve decided to write a book or make your own sushi or something.”
“THOU SHALT NOT DISOBEY ME. THOU SHALT NOT IGNORE ME. THOU SHALT SHOWER ME WITH PEANUT M&MS.”
“No really. I could even get behind you learning to play the guitar.”
“DEMI GODS DON’T PLAY GUITAR. THEY HAVE GUITAR PLAYERS. TOPLESS ONES.”
*Ben’s Friend has gone offline.*
“THOU SHALT….COME…BACK? It’s lonely at the top….”