"Just had a Ben Boudreau moment…"

The gays like to brunch. We all know that. It’s nothing new.

What some of you may not be so familiar with is having a gay MAKE you brunch. That’s right – we’re not talking roll out of bed with last night’s fake eyelashes still on, slap on a pair of morning stilettos and stumble down a couple blocks here kids. Having a home-cooked homo brunch is an EXPERIENCE.

Over the weekend, I had two people over for brunch that I absolutely adore. While cleaning my house from top to bottom including rooms that would never actually be viewed under any routine Brunching circumstances, I decided I would save myself stress the morning of and made a breakfast bake the night before.

The breakfast bake is a magical thing of cheesey, eggy, carby goodness. It’s actually called a Wife Saver but I can’t decide if I find that sexist or hilarious. Anyhow, I made it the night before and popped it in the oven the next day while we enjoyed the first course.

Mimosas.

Just kidding. Coffee and Bailey’s was involved as well.

When I took the breakfast bake out of the oven, it was traumatic. Some half-drunk Canadian blogger with the initials B.B. screwed up the proportions at 1:30am the night before while half in the bag with a bottle of red wine. But I’m not naming names.

The bake was questionable at best so I threw it away and recovered with another meal option on the fly. ROLL WITH THE PUNCHES PEOPLE. Even when you’re morning drunk off Mimosas, you can still pull it together when people are watching to avoid making a scene. That means YOU, Lohan.

So then today I get this email from one of my guests:

I just got this in an email from Boy Wonder:

He made his chili last night and had a Ben Boudreau moment today where he says “It didn’t turn out. I’m not serving that.”

And I replied with this:

Oh no. I’m depressed that a ‘Ben Boudreau moment’ is screwing up a meal.

A ‘Ben Boudreau moment’ should be looking awesome, sounding like a genius, and getting oral from an underwear model.

And she replied with this epic description of what it’s like to experience Home Entertainer Ben Boudreau who convinces himself there is value in staying up until two in the bloody morning to create an environment worthy of Wisteria Lane for friends who really don’t expect or condone such lunacy:

I think the moment was actually your raging perfectionism. “My Wife Saver wasn’t PERFECT IN EVERY CONCEIVABLE WAY, so I’m throwing it out.” But not even the way people usually throw things out – no sir. You PICK UP THE PIPING HOT PAN and took it directly out to the trash. I think it was even the OUTDOOR trash.

Raging perfectionism. THAT is Ben Boudreau.

From the people who know me best, folks….