[If you're a newer reader, you may not have experienced the trainwreckery of my Dream Date series. Basically I write the G-rated version of how a date between me and some of my favourite bloggers (one at a time, of course, I'm not an animal) would play out. I may have let the dust settle on what is often a grossly inappropriate experience but I'm ready to bring it back.
Considering that in less than a week I will be having a seven-day, epic monstrosity of a real life dream date with the wildly famous and popular Tia from Clever Girl Goes Blog, it's only natural that I finally pay my respects to her awesomeness - not just for putting me up next week but that's definitely a part of it - with her very own, and all soon-to-be true, dream date feature.
I heart run-on sentences.
Also Tia, spare me the sass that this isn't a video post as promised. I'm giving you my 600th bloody blog post so I will hear no complaints. DEDICATING MILESTONE POSTS IS THE TRUEST OF LOVES!]
1:55pm – Mentally prepare for the eight hours, two planes, and two major American cities worth of time wherein I must remain a vision of first impression perfection.
8:00pm – Land in California and try to reel in my laughter at her proposed welcome signage to maintain an attractive facial expression lest I scare her off. She has already bounced some ideas off me – my favourite so far is a sign saying “PETER DEWOLF” (the more eloquent and charming blogger with whom I share a Canadian province in a ‘this town’s not big enough for the two of us’ kind of way. Except the town is plenty big. And we’re both pacivists).
Her favourite is “MAIL-ORDER CANADIAN”.
9:00pm - drink, giggle and play with each other’s hair until further notice. Really…we should all feel really bad for her husband who will quickly hate the two of us together. The combined snarkiness hotness will be unbearable.
Shoppity shop shop shopperson shop with breaks to eat burritos. That is all.
Oh wait – and maybe see a bit of the city. MAYBE.
Well, only if there’s time.
But there probably won’t be since I’ll be spooning the William Rast collection.
YES PLEASE.
Beach, BBQ, and her (hopefully) over the top Italian family will play a role in this good ole fashion God Bless AmURRica day.
I will also require a trip to the zoo to see cuddly baby animals and teeny tiny penguins. Then I might consider acting like an adult instead of a toddler coming off an Ecstacy bender. Or the penguins might make it worse. Time will tell.
For the Cheesecakesicles.
I mean Tia.
I mean the Cheesecakesicles.
(and my waistline…)