It’s too good to just read, so please do yourself a favour and put a smile on your face by watching the latest No Ordinary Vlog:
Again, as I responsible blogger who presents both sides of puppy ownership, the excrement count is up to three throw-ups, one poop and two pees. The best part? All were outdoors!! WIN!
P.S. All three of my wieners are napping so I have the chance to really tell you all how overjoyed I am right now 
So overjoyed that I don’t mind posting a video that showcases me covered in puppy feces and sweat from the gross humidity we’re rocking right now.
{ 54 comments… read them below or add one }
I know I shouldn't be laughing at what was clearly a very traumatizing situation, but.. um… *stifled giggle*
Rather than getting in a cab barefoot, I would have called a locksmith, LOL
That sounds like a bad day.
@Ben pobrecito: an affectionate way of saying “poor guy” in Espanol.
Michelle: In that case I would have crawled underneath the deck to die. Until the newf got home at least.
Jassie: No. Underwear. That is all.
Dutchess: Made him bring me back home and let me run into get a credit card. Oh the shame…
Bridget: That's AWESOME.
Nicole: I wouldn't wish such stress on anyone.
Wordperv: Great idea!
Ashley: Desperate times…
Jen: hahaha you're so right.
Matt: In fairness, I sleep au naturel. Those are just to keep neighbors from judging me when I walk around in the mornings. I'm sure you really wanted to know that.
Mandy: It was the least I could do to share the occasion.
Wegrit: I don't even know what I would have done had I been completely naked. Curled up and died, I suppose.
Molly: For sure. I was fairly covered…just jiggley.
MsDarkstar: A key AND a full outfit. Just in case.
Deutlich: I knew you'd like that.
Brandy: Not as glad as I was.
CantHardlyWait: Gross. I know.
Kellie: I'll say!
Teedee: Here's hoping…
Kyla: I'm going to need five, please.
Chase: As with most moments of my life.
Ang: I couldn't while it was happening, but it was funny immediately after. Thank god.
Elisabeth: It's the least I could do.
Surviving: I sleep nekkid. That's my LOUNGEwear if we're being specific. You just pictured me naked, didn't you? DIDN'T YOU?
Brooke: Cute right??
Mermanda: My parents are proud of me.
Tarek: My friend made those for me!
Mel: Agreed on both counts.
BeeHappy: Oh good. My tragic reputation is spreading.
Lindsay: It was my boss' idea when I called to explain why I wouldn't be in for my morning meetings. Sigh.
Craig: I'm almost TOO Dartmouth for Dartmouth.
Meghan: Don't make me do that…
GiftedTypist: Theme of my life. At least they're usually funnyish.
Taylor: Well thanks!
Roro: I KNEW you'd know the proper terminology.
MsSalti: Glad to make you laugh!
BumbleBee: I'm used to it.
Himbo: Oh my…I've never slept on a stoop….so I guess I have that going for me. Pobrecito?
Tia: Don't let me forget about this.
Ashley: It was not. It NEVER is.
Akilah: Oh you poor thing. When you're as big a mess as I am, you learn to be resourceful.
AskAlice: Win!
RedMojo: I thought about breaking a window but I'd be more likely to break my own arm and bleed to death. Sad but true.
Mishi: Thanks
Katy: You're welcome.
Phil: Damnit. I'm two decades late.
Amindinmotown: Awwww….lies.
Tipp: I won't tell her if you don't.
Kez: What a TERRIBLE prize.
Katelin: You're very right. I would have been arrested.
Grace: Good!
Brazen: Hahahahahahahaha that's AWESOME.
JPP: Awwwww….we'll talk later.
Maxie: You'd love that.
at least you weren't JUST wearing underwear.
BRAAHHHHH! That happened to me once when I was just a night shirt and undies. Luckily the dog door accomodates my 130lb labrador so I wiggled my ass through it. Yes, I used the dog door..I now keep a hidden key in the front AND backyard.
if it makes you feel any better, I *did* laugh.
haha oh man that stinks. at least you were wearing pajama pants though and not just boxers or something, that could have been a little bit more mortifying i think. haha.
Hahaha I thought I had some awesome
“been locked out” stories, but you totally win!
My mother always told me that it isn't nice to laugh at other people's calamities. Sorry Mom!
It's nice to know your life isn't perfect Mr. Perfecty!
Seriously, you're hot, and I doubt anyone had much issue seeing you in clingy pajama pants.
…Just saying.
Just think, if this was the 80s, people wouldn't even think twice about seeing you in the plaid pajamas.
Wow, I have locked myself out before, but it's never been that bad…
Thanks for giving me something to laugh over today.
Caught outside – without undies?? Hahahaha. Oh MAN. That's rough. I feel for you, but this is funniest thing I've read in a long time.
OMG, You are too funny, and very brave. I would stay in the backyard all day, until someone came home to let me in, or I'd have broken a window. Thanks for the laugh at your expense!
A+
You just made my day
Dayum, that was something else! At least you thought of the taxi. I would have been found dehydrated and sprawled out in my backyard, pecked by vultures. As a lady, I would have been partially naked so I would've been pecked in interesting places.
I'm really sorry, but i'm laughing hysterically right now. I hope the rest of your day was all sparkle and unicorns!
remind me to show you the senior video project that jenbun and i made in high school.
that's all i'm at liberty to say at this time.
I am laughing my ass off. I'm sorry you had such a shitty day. That really sucks, Ben! Hope today is better for you!
HAHAHAHAAAAAAA!
Seriously. Cannot. Stop. Laughing.
I believe the male version of cameltoe is “mooseknuckles”. You're welcome.
that last line – epic fail – beautiful
Explain male cameltoe please?
you're hardcore Dartmouth now. The school office bit kills!
Craig
I'm not even sure getting in a cab would have occured to me. That was very resourceful of you.
This was hilarious! I sent it to a few friends to read too. Thanks for letting us in on your bad day!
At least you weren't shirtless!
PS: Kill the yorkies…this is all their fault!
I don't understand why people are concentrating on you being shirtless… (GET A HINT)…
I'd say good thing you weren't walking around in your undies dude..
(love the pants, no sarcasm!)
I have no words for you. Only sympathy, my barefooted meth-addict-impersonator friend.
I'm sorry, what were you saying? I was distracted by the little puppy peeking it's head around the corner in your picture.
On the bright side, this made for a great story!
This is a classic moment.
I can't believe you wear all that to sleep in though, I'd be sweating like crazy.
Bwahahahaha! I am so entirely amused at your expense, for which I thank you
oh god this is positively hilarious. ughhhh at least you can laugh at yourself?
I love that you can see a little dachshund head peeking into the room in the mirror.
lol Oh no!! This is priceless, and a case for hiding what we affectionately call an “Idiot Key” somewhere in your backyard =)
Jammie pants $20, shirt $20, Story with pictures – Priceless!! Near fell out of my chair when you started with MacGyver & the Dashhund! Getting strange looks in the office! I just KNOW this story will improve as it ages!
Hey Britney, didn't people tell you not to go anywhere public barefoot? Haha, just kiddin. At least you had your shirt on and at least you weren't wearing only your underware.
You cabbed it barefooted?!
Oh Ben. I want to be really sympathetic and not laugh at you but I'm finding it impossible to suppress the giggling. I'm glad you finally got in.
BWWWWWWWWWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I thought about “wait, how'd you pay for the cab”, too but then remembered that you would have had to cab HOME, too and then could get inside to your wallet…
Sorry you had to go through all that. Perhaps you need to hide a key somewhere in case this happens again.
This is like a movie scene. I bet you wish it was a movie instead. The cab, the school office. Hey at least you didn't run out with less clothing, right? Could have been a lot sketchier.
This post is why I keep coming back to you! I love that these things happen to you — in the sense that I like that they make a good story, not in the sense that it's awesome that they happen to you.
And look on the bright side…you could have been just in your underwear. Or completely naked.
I just spit out my coffee. Thanks for a good laugh. You are very brave to post a pic. =)
Yeah, your pajamas could have been alot worse.
be thankful you have good sleep wear style.
Be grateful that you weren't in just boxers and a robe….or just a robe!!! That would definitely be a bad situation!!
Couldn't help but chuckle…sorry!
There's no way I could have gotten in a cab barefoot. NO WAY!
Oh Ben! While I realize this caused you mad drama and shame, it caused me to laugh out loud and for that, I thank you. =)
BTW, get one of these:
http://store.nexternal.com/shared/StoreFront/default.asp?CS=resc&StoreType=BtoC&Count1=766872584&Count2=684013009&ProductID=70&Target=products.asp
I have one and it's been very helpful when I've locked myself out on occasion…
Haha wow! If I ever do anything as amazing as that in the next sixty years of my life it'll be thanks to you.
…You have cool pyjamas though, if that's any consolation.